I recently got called out by my friend, Forest. We were on the phone and he said something like…
“You’re not bringing your full self to your work. I know your work and I’ve also spent a lot of time with you. And there’s a gap.”
My heart started beating harder. Was he calling me a fraud?
He continued:
“There was this one time I was walking out of the grocery store in Boulder, and I see you pull up to me in your car and there are all of these people around and you yell — really loudly so that everyone can hear — ‘HEY! HOW MUCH FOR A BLOW JOB?!?’
“And I’m standing there like some kind of grocery shopping street walker and everyone is looking at me. I just started laughing my ass off. I still laugh about that when I come out of the grocery store.”
I had completely forgotten about this, but I knew it was true. Because I had done it numerous times throughout the years. And I’ve been the butt of that joke way more times than I can count.
(It was especially fun to do in Boulder where many folks are professionals when it comes to getting offended.)
He went on, “There’s the guy you are in your podcast and in your writings, but you’re leaving out the super funny, mischievous, playful part of yourself. And I really miss that. Your stuff would be so much better if you brought your humor into it.”
This hit me hard. I could hear all of these conflicting thoughts in my head. I felt fear coming up.
I responded, “A part of me is saying, ‘I can’t do that!’ My fear is that if I’m playful and funny then I won’t be taken seriously. I’m afraid the powerful, extraordinary people that I enjoy coaching will think I’m some immature kid.”
I thought about it some more and then said, “Wow. That’s how I play small. That’s the limiting belief. If I’m really myself people won’t like me. Then I won’t be successful. Therefore I’ve got to be less of who I really am in order to be successful.”
(Pause.)
What if that wasn’t completely true?
What if we didn’t really have to play a role in order to be liked or successful?
What if we brought a little bit more of who we truly are into our work today?
I’ll see you at the grocery store,
Tripp
Click here to learn more about coaching with Tripp Lanier.
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